Wednesday, January 8, 2020

Peace—A Simple Start



Dear Humans…

So you’re not a world leader…what can you do to create peace on Earth?

We are living in what feels like very uncertain times where nothing feels stable anymore and everything seems to be changing and undergoing massive disruption. Rest assured, this is on purpose. Radical transformation is necessary on every level of life from a world perspective between governments and nations, to our blessed Pancha Mamma in upheaval with fires and calamity all about, to our justified concerns about the quality of our air and water, to the perversion of our food through pesticides and GMO's, to the whoredoms of big pharma at the absolute detriment of our health, to the bastardization of religion at the detriment of our spiritual well-being, to the destructive programming of our sacred littles in public education. (Think Jesus overturning the tables of the money changers in the temple court.) That’s how I see what’s happening in our world right now. Transformation, overthrow, do-over—it’s time. The universe, earth, humans, animals, and plants say ENOUGH! Whatever we’ve been doing isn’t working—or it’s working perfectly to wreak enough havoc so people have to up their give-a-shit-quotient and wake up from their Muggle-Slumber. This won't be a quick fix and will require all hands on deck.

Change is challenging for many of us. And if you're of the ilk that attempts to keep everything in your life ‘status quo’ and smooth-like, this may be an even more difficult time for you. The upset in our personal lives is just a microcosm of the macrocosm. Our current state of global affairs is simply a reflection of our planetary collective (un)conscious. No person, organization, world leader, or institution of any kind, is to blame other than ourSelves. This is OUR collective doing. Every bit of it. We can no longer point our fingers outside of ourselves and blame another because we are the other. We will NEVER heal that way. Separation, duality and an 'us vs them' mentality are what has us in this place.

What can lil old you possibly do to make a difference in this crazy world? 


First of all, you can stop complaining, bitching, moaning and whining. Until we step out of our personal victim-mentality and take radical personal responsibility and ownership for the heaven or shit-show of our lives, and actually do something about it and stop blaming and/or expecting our government, our ex, our parents, our boss, etc to fix it, bail us out, or save us—we will remain in this mess. Nothing will get better and like Edmund Burke said, “The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men (and women) to do nothing.” Most of us have all been doing NOTHING for way too long, and it is exactly the reason we are here now. Regardless of what we’ve been programmed to believe, we are NOT helpless. We contain all of the power—we just don’t realize it.

How do we fix it? How can we create peace, when we’re not the ones with access to that red phone? I have a few ideas. Let’s keep it simple for now.


1. Stop clinging to a life you hate because of your fear. Let it go. Let go of everything that enslaves you. It's costing you! If you are in a marriage, partnership, job, religion, or personal belief system that feels like it is draining your life-force and vitality, get the fuck out. If you are in a marriage because you are afraid you can’t make it on your own, or your church/beliefs told you to stay no matter what and it isn’t authentic for you—it’s killing you. Same with your job, if you dread it and can not find anything about it to like—it’s killing you. As David Whyte more eloquently puts it, “Anything that does not bring you alive is too (fucking) small for you.” And allow me to add, if it is too small for you, then it is most likely draining you. If it is an energy suck and not an energy boost, your mood and level of consciousness will remain low af. When your emotions are resonating at the frequency of apathy, anger, grief, shame or guilt, your health will also be in the gutter. HOW YOU FEEL MATTERS! If it’s not life-affirming, it’s life draining. Ask yourSelf if how you are living is nourishing your Soul or if it’s toxic? You can not change the world living in a toxic environment. Change it or get out!

2. Follow your heart and your authentic bliss….it will lead you right into your life purpose. What do you care about? What makes you cry? What lights your soul on fire? Almost always our dharma is connected to how we can assist and serve others. What is your gift? How do you bring Light into a dark world? What is that thing you do that always feels like a contribution and makes you happy and proud inside? Do that!! Pursue THAT!! Do more of it! Either figure out how to earn a living doing it or do it on the side as much as you can. It will bring you joy!! Joy is a high frequency!! It will attract more good things and give everyone around you permission to live in their own joy.

3. Cultivate inner peace. No, it’s not that hard. Once you have courageously let go of what is toxic and are boldly pursuing that which is nourishing, you will inevitably experience more joy and clarity. Knowing that you are on the right path of liberation and purpose creates an environment of inner peace and is an absolute byproduct of your clarity and vision. F
rom the alchemist "To realize one’s destiny is a person’s only obligation." When people everywhere start stepping into their own brilliance and power, and not waiting for someone else to do it for them, they will develop a sense of self-worth and confidence. Their happiness will grow when they are BE-ing the Light instead of draining someone else’s. We can not expect peace in the world until we can create peace in our own families, tribes, and communities. If you can’t divorce consciously and amicably without a war, you are to blame for wars between nations. If you’re a hater, you add to the collective hate vibe on the planet. Figure that shit out! It doesn’t take a rocket scientist. As is the microcosm, so is the macrocosm. YOU ARE MAKING A DIFFERENCE—whether you consciously know it or not. Choose to be conscious about what your contribution is to the collective. 

So what can YOU do? CREATE PEACE in your own sphere of influence. Stop pointing the finger of blame elsewhere and look inside yourself. It’s the ONLY place YOU can make a difference, initially. Want world peace? Transform the anger, rage, bitterness, and apathy in your own Soul first. Then, you will be liberated from your chains that bind, your heart will feel light, your mind will be clear and YOU will be BEING the fucking change, already. Imagine what would be possible if you dropped all of your toxic bullshit, you might have beautiful expansive ideas instead of hateful contracting ones. You would be free to pursue your truth and purpose instead of spending your time seeking revenge and placing blame everywhere outside of yourself.

Imagine if we all acknowledged our own part in the devastation of our planet and decided to make an about-face and at least rectify our own negative output with something more authentic and positive. Imagine a wave of that across our beautiful planet. Imagine refusing to commiserate with all the Muggle’s complaints about the President, and world affairs. Imagine instead, sharing your bliss about what you are doing that helps you feel joy and creates peace within YOU. The world is waiting for us to wake up, show up and shine. We are the ones we’ve been waiting for. Release your toxic life and relationships, follow your heart, cultivate inner peace and for fuck’s sake, BE NICE. That is the way we TRANSFORM the world. One crusty Muggle conversion at a time.


Wednesday, October 2, 2019

How to Harness the Power of Navaratri & the Goddess for the Processes of Fall

pic found on SewaGroup

Navaratri-Nine Nights of the Goddess 

What I’ve found over the decades of being a junkie for spirituality, is that traditions, mythologies and even megalithic structures from all over the world, not only point to similar things, but most of them also point to the cycles of nature in some way. It is clear to me, that the Divine, spells it all out for us in every direction that we look, that what is going on ‘out there’ (in nature and the cosmos) is also going on within ourSelves. One of those traditions that show up in fall, is Maha Navaratri. I’ve been in love with this holy-day since we first met! 

Navaratri is a  special celebration from the Hindu tradition that honors the goddess and is venerated in India and Nepal. It occurs about five times a year with the most celebrated being Spring and Fall as it marks the turning of the year. It commemorates the dance of the Divine Feminine for ushering in the shift in the seasons. It’s a portal in time, marking a transition between the seen and unseen, spirit and matter, and the dark and the light. It’s a time when we feel like we are straddling both worlds and we are neither here nor there, but somewhere in between in the netherworld. Probably for this very reason, that you hear that the veil between worlds is thin at this time and is ripe for contacting ancestors and angels. 

The most significant/potent of the two Navaratri celebrations is during Fall, that’s why it’s called ‘Maha’ Navaratri. ‘Maha’ means great, ‘Nava’ means nine, and ‘ratri’ means night in Sanskrit. So essentially, it means the great nine nights of the goddess. This ‘holy’-day coincides with the Vedic lunar calendar and is thought to be the most powerful ten days of the year. The ancient seers/rishis of India identified Navratri as the time for the destruction of evil forces due to the power available at this time, to let go, destroy, release, transform and transmute our darkness into light. It is associated with a death cycle as the days get shorter and the nights get longer and life is being called into silence. Being closely linked with the seasons and with nature, it supports transformation, letting go, and healing. It invites our own deep dive into consciousness, awareness and our own inner wisdom.

So the story goes that each year during Navratri, the Great Mother manifests herself in the warrior form of Durga/Kali to battle the evil demon Mahishasura, who represents the dark forces that threaten the existence of goodness. The Goddess/Divine Feminine/Shakti Energy (Devas), descends to the Earth plane to awaken the Earth from a deep slumber. Her mission is to destroy the demons (Asuras) that could be interpreted as all types of negativity, evil forces and disharmony like the ego, greed, lust, laziness, fear, ignorance, sickness, anger, poverty, and jealousy that threaten to destroy our creative life and spiritual progress. She battles Mahishasura for nine nights and is victorious in the demons’ destruction on the 10th day.

It’s the classic battle between the light and dark, the good and bad, and the conscious and the sub-conscious that takes place within all beings. The story shows good triumphing over evil as the Devas/goddesses personify courage, universal love and self-discipline that overcome the Asuras/ego-driven nature of desires and greed. It is also a reminder that what is going on ‘out there’ in nature, when we are in the balance of light and dark, is also going on within ourselves, and that we, like the Devas, have the power to heal, transform and integrate those polarities within ourSelves. 

Navaratri is the celebration of the goddess in all of her forms. In many traditions, she is not simply an energy, vibration or frequency. She is the mega-divine female, the Mother Divine—the counterpart of God the Father, create-ress of the phenomenal world. The invitation during this sacred time is to align with the powerful forces of this Divine Feminine/Divine Mother Shakti energy in the form of Durga, Lakshmi and Saraswati who represent power, abundance and wisdom in their most auspicious forms. They are each celebrated for three of the nine nights.

The power-house of this goddess trinity can be invoked to assist us in these shadowy processes of fall. Let’s take a look at how allowing the glorious light of the goddess to enter our consciousness, can assist us in transmuting our own darkness. It’s only fitting that we begin with Durga/Kali as she is the first aspect venerated at Navaratri and the most bad-ass for our own descent into darkness that initiates our own path to enlightenment. In fact, she should definitely join Archangel Michael as the feminine patron saint of our Beautiful Darkness journey. 

First of all, who is this trinity of feminine badasses? 

Durga aka Kali: She is the warrior goddess extraordinaire—complete with belt of dismembered heads. She wipes out, purifies, uproots, and transforms. She offers protection from enemies and dark forces. 

Lakshmi: She is the goddess of wealth, fortune, beauty and health. Lakshmi is said to bestow inexhaustible wealth on her devotees. She is the goddess of the home and ensures you have everything that you need. She offers support and nurturing in all areas of life.

Saraswati: She is the goddess of wisdom, the creative arts, music, skill, speech  and education. She is the goddess of consciousness. On Navaratri she dons a more ferocious form to eradicate ignorance and impurity in the world. She bestows right knowledge, understanding, creativity and artistry. She blesses her devotees with clarity, discrimination, wisdom and attaining excellence in the arts and sciences. 


In order to have all-around success in life, believers seek the blessings of all three aspects of the divine feminine, hence the nine nights of worship.

I like to think about what it looks like, in our modern world to embrace and embody each of those aspects of the goddess and how I would invoke their energies. For the purpose of the particular work in this book of fall and the shadow, this is how I see these energies manifesting:

As I was meditating on Kali and how I could invoke her for shadow work, I saw her with her sword and her eyes were firey to illuminate truth from bullshit. I have always seen her as a fierce ‘momma bear’ energy, like someone who would be looking out for your best interest in a ferocious way. My request or invocation was that she would embody us, in a way that we could see with her eyes, the truthfulness of our lives. In other words, if Kali were surveying your life (imagine her eyes behind yours), she wouldn’t mince her words, her tongue is like a sword. If she were to see you in a toxic relationship, and you tried to tell her that it wasn’t that bad, she would rip you a new one with clarity and truth. She would call a spade a spade and say, “WTF are you doing here? Do you not know your worth?” She would take her sword and slash that relationship in half. She would pick up that addiction, that you have been justifying as ‘not that bad’, and lift it over her head and smash it to the ground into a thousand pieces—because she loves you. 

I see Kali as an energy that would illuminate and awaken our own consciousness to all of our negativity, self-sabotage, and playing small ways. She would wield her sword of truth to illuminate any toxicity or inauthenticity in your life and in your sub-conscious. Her tenacity and eyes of fire would have you see with brutal honesty, all that is no longer in alignment with the truth of you and your dharma, and aid you in rooting it out. I see the fire shooting out of her eyes, like a super-hero burning to the ground, all that isn’t authentic. 

As you courageously take on this work, you too, will wear your own slayed demons around your belt of accomplishments from that which you have transmuted from your own shadowsalchemically having transformed your darkness into light and power. 

When you use the energy of Kali, just know, blood will be shed—your own. When you see yourself with her fiery eyes, there will be no more excuses, you will instantly be incinerated at the first untruth or self-deception that comes forth from your lips. All your excuses that have justified your bad behavior will evaporate, and you will be left witnessing the harsh truth of you. If that weren’t enough, you will see all the ways you have betrayed yourSelf and your own Soul and you will be left bleeding out on the battlefield of your own interior. 

However, as devastating as this may initially appear, it is the first step on your path to enlightenment, often called the dark night of the Soul. It is a death of sorts, to all that is inauthentic and toxic to your new growth and evolution. But just like the promise of the sliver of the new moon that comes after the dark moon, and the Winter Solstice that celebrates the return of the light when it is at its weakest, when you are lying lifeless from your harrowing battle, Maha Lakshmi comes to your aide. 

Ahhhh momma Lakshmi. She always reminds me of my grandmother, the goddess of the hearth and home. My grandmother was the glue of our family. She had a large, Victorian home in Maine, that you could always count on being well nourished there in her care. She provided us all with home cooked meals, a roof over our head, and a listening ear in hard times. 

How I envision Lakshmi, in our work of the shadow, is the great nurturer and goddess of self care. When you find yourSelf bleeding out at some of the devastation the radical, fiery-eyes of Kali has brought to light, call on Maha Lakshmi. Embody her loving care as you bestow yourSelf with some creature comforts. Put on your favorite sweater, make yourself some warm soup or a cup of tea. Beautify your surroundings with flowers, a clean space, and cozy blankets. 

Do all that you can to nurture yourSelf while you are undergoing this dark process. If Kali were the body/embodiment, Lakshmi would be the heart. To see yourSelf through the compassionate eyes of Lakshmi, picture the grandmothers, taking you in after you just got beat up by life. How would they nurture your Soul? What creature comforts would feel the most nourishing to you at this time? Don’t deprive yourSelf, pamper yourSelf. Show yourSelf some Lakshmi Self-love and care. 

I like to picture Lakshmi as the attending nurse, that comes while my Soul is in the ICU unit. She is going to breathe life back into me and show me that beauty exists on the other side of my pain. She is here to shine the light of hope that all will be well—like the celebration of the Light on the Winter Solstice. Part of the gift of Lakshmi is not only material wealth, but spiritual wealth as well. 

When you have re-gained your strength, are feeling better, and Lakshmi has taught you how to nurture and have compassion for your wounded Self, in comes your wise counselor, Saraswati. She will assist you in turning your wounds into wisdom by processing all that you have gone through. 

Saraswati is going to aide you in comprehending, making peace with, and transforming your past, and your shadows and the masks that you wear to hide them. She will act like an alchemist and transmit to you how everything you have undergone, has had meaning and purpose and was for the growth of your Soul. You will gain great wisdom as you submit and surrender to her counsel. 

You can invoke the wisdom of Saraswati, to know what music would be best for the processing of different emotions, and which essential oils would be powerful to facilitate bringing up and healing past wounds. You can request her inspiration while you use any of the creative arts of drawing, writing, painting, or singing as a means of therapy and inspiration for others. 

Her wisdom will guide you to connect any dots of your past pain with your own dharma and life purpose. Often our greatest strengths come from our deepest wounds, and become a gift when we can share those stories of over-coming with others in their times of need.

Aligning with the energy of the goddess at Navaratri, supports the process of fall and assists us in shining the light of awareness on our shadows, knowing what deserves to be released, and letting go of what is no longer serving our highest, authentic, expression. As we let go of our darkness, we create space for our inner light and wisdom to arise. 

It matters not if you are male or female—the Divine Shakti power that sustains life, exists in both men and women as receptivity, nurturing, vulnerability, beauty, inspiration, fertility, prosperity, joy, intuition, and community and are available to all of us. In a world where It appears that the goddess has long been forgotten, and is no longer a living presence for most people in our modern, industrial, patriarchal society, we would do well to bring Her back into our awareness. When our connection to Her is weak, we suffer financially, physically, mentally and emotionally. The Shakti power brings everything that is enlivening, nurturing and inspiring into this world. 

There is so much more to this power-house trinity of goddesses! What I’ve shared above, is how to utilize the energy for a specific purpose. I’ll be sharing more about how to invoke different archetypal energies with each turn of the wheel of life—coming up next with the Winter Solstice, then the Spring Equinox and culminating with the Summer Solstice. Meanwhile, do your own research, ask yourSelf how you embody each one of those energies and how do they play out in your life. Where have you abandoned the goddess? Which goddess archetype do you feel more aligned? Which energy comes easy and which is more of a challenge for you—the brutal honesty and momma bear quality of Kali, the Self-love, nurturing and compassion of Lakshmi or turning your wounds into wisdom, like Saraswati? 

Embody, invoke or propitiate these goddess energies as your own spiritual practice dictates. Follow your heart. Create your own rituals. Set up a sacred alter. Light a candle. Meditate. Chant an ancient mantra to one of these or other goddesses, or make up your own. Place a picture or a statue of your favorite goddess in a prominent or auspicious spot in your home or yard. Be more conscious and aware of honoring the goddess in all of her forms throughout your day. Bow. Have gratitude. Allow the Divine Feminine some space to be embodied within yourSelf. Love. Flow. Create. Happy Navaratri. ©Laurie Frazier ~excerpt from Beautiful Darkness

Using Crystals to Represent the Energies of Kali, Lakshmi & Saraswati to Facilitate the Processes of Fall

So if using crystals are a part of your practice, or you would like them to be, or if you have no clue what I’m talking about right now, let’s keep it simple. Crystals, rocks, stones, etc carry specific energies, as do herbs, animals, elements, and seasons. Whether they truly have the energy that they’ve been used for for hundreds/thousands of years or whether they don’t, for me, they have the energy ((( I )) bestow on them. It is my intention that empowers the ‘thing’ to hold that energy for me. 

When I have a particular goal, something I want to manifest, create or let go of, I will often set up a sacred space a.k.a. alter, that I put carefully chosen items on to represent whatever it is that I am working on. Just the focused act of contemplating that particular intention, and choosing what I do to represent it, has power. Every time I walk by that sacred space, I am reminded of what I am working on, if only momentarily. The physical representation in my home of my mental construct, assists me in bringing the particular goal into fruition. 

As I intentionally choose the things I do, I am clear in my mind that I am choosing what I choose, for very specific reasons.  Sometimes, the same item will represent different things, at different times. For instance, a feather may represent harnessing the element of air and another time, it may represent something I am letting go of, thus making myself ‘light as a feather.’ The power comes in my clarity and my specific intention for that particular item. 

I prefer to go with the flow and tap into the energy that has already been used for hundreds of years, like a feather representing air, a candle representing fire and a rose quartz having the energy of love and compassion. Like a Sanskrit sutra, which is simply a mantra with meaning, that has been chanted repetitively for thousands of years and is believed to carry the specific energy of its meaning by the mere chanting of it—particular items, because they have been used for thousands of years for specific ends, go with that! Because why not? It’s like a stone rolling downhill—that’s the energy you want to tap into. And, there are always things that hold specific meaning for me and nobody else, I use those just as often. 

So that was a long introduction to saying here are the different crystals I would use to harness/represent the energies of the goddesses above, Kali, Lakshmi and Saraswati as the particular way that they manifest during our shadow processes of fall. 

Kali: Any black stone like obsidian, black tourmaline, etc. Why? Because black stones are known to absorb negativity. I had an experience once, while teaching in an addiction treatment facility, where one of the patients that had just relapsed on heroine, was holding my black tourmaline and this fist size stone broke in half in his hand! No kidding. I was like, this shit is real! So get some black stones/crystals, if it resonates with you, holds it in your hand while you are meditating on these heavy emotions, carry it in your pocket or bra. Maybe on the left side, by your heart ladies, to absorb all that resentment, anger, and disappointment. I suggest that when you use it, you communicate with it and let it know its job. “Beautiful crystal, please absorb any negativity that resides in me.” “Thank you for holding my negative thoughts, emotions, etc.” 

Be intentional. Connect with whatever you are using. Hold it in your hands, close your eyes, notice if you feel anything whatsoever—warmth, vibration, tingling, coolness. Do it often. As you let go of your heavy stuff, you will become more sensitive. Keep tuning in. Let  these items/objects/oils/rocks/plants/etc speak to you. Also, speak to them. Let them know what you would like them to represent for you. Conjur up the feeling, power, emotion you want them to carry, while you are holding it and imbue them with it. 

Apparently, back in the way back machine, crystals used to be used to carry messages from one kingdom to another. Yet another lost art. I digress…

Lakshmi: Although Lakshmi is known most for the quality of abundance, in this work of the shadow, we are harnessing her aspect of being the goddess of health and well-being and invoking her for Self-love and care. In pictures of Lakshmi, pink often seems to be one of the predominant colors. As I meditated on her, and how we could best use her energy in the dark work of fall, she came to me as a nurse and a care-taker, like a really good grandmother. The stone that best represents that to me is hands down, rose quartz. 

Rose quartz is the stone of love and compassion. It feels very Venusian, which Lakshmi also represents being the goddess of beauty and the home. Get a nice big chunk of it for your alter, a smaller one for your pocket, or buy it in jewelry and wear it. One can never manifest or harness enough love and compassion—especially Self-love. 

Every time you see this warm pink stone, ask yourself, “What can I do to nourish me?” “What do I need in this moment?” Also ask yourself where have you not been caring for you and showing yourSelf some love. How is that Self-talk going? Are you being kind to you? Is there an environment of friendliness within yourSelf? If not, please remind yourSelf that having compassion for you, is the only healthy way to do this work. If you find yourself being more of a hater, put the work down. You don’t get to play here without the loving compassion of Lakshmi. Let this pink rock be a reminder to you, with every glimpse, to love you some you. 

Saraswati: Without question the crystal I would use in honoring the quality of wisdom in Saraswati in this situation, is amethyst. Why? Because purple is the color that represents the crown chakra and also the sixth or sixth sense, and both are connected to inner and divine wisdom. Amethyst is a very high-frequency, purifying stone that is not only used to protect against negative energy, but is also known to awaken higher consciousness. 

In other words, because we are invoking Saraswati, to assist us in turning our wounds into wisdom, it requires us stepping out of our egos and tapping into our Higher Selves. Our Higher Selves, can see with different eyes, the big picture. Using our intuition, we can see how everything we have gone through is also pointing us in a direction, cultivating strengths, and creating skills we didn’t have before the challenge. Using the energy of Saraswati, amethyst, and our own intention we can alchemize our weakness into strengths, and make chicken soup, out of chicken shit (as my grandmother used to say) or more pc, turning lemons into lemonade. 

Again, none of this is necessary. Wether you see these goddesses as real for you or merely archetypal, whether you believe crystals and stones inherently carry the energy I’ve shared or they don’t, it matters not. Real or imagined, fairy tale or quantum physics, we are simply pointing to something. We are more powerful than we can even imagine. Our beliefs create our world. I choose to align with those that not only feel resonate to my heart and Soul, but ones that give my life more meaning and a magical quality. 

I choose to be an active participant with the Divine/Higher Self in the co-creation of my life. I like to set clear intentions, and align myself with the energies present for a more effortless and graceful flow to my experience. I enjoy feeling intimately connected to nature, the seasons and the elements—which includes, but is not limited to trees, plants, animals, and stones. Mythology, archetypes and story-telling give me an anchor on which to align my own experience and have a greater understanding of my world. Connecting all of these dots, harnessing all of the energies I resonate with to manifest and create what I desire, makes me feel like an alchemical wizard and magical af—if only in my own mind, which is all that ever matters, anyway.  ©Laurie Frazier ~excerpt from Beautiful Darkness-A Journey through the Shadows to Emotional Freedom






Saturday, September 21, 2019

The Fall Equinox—the First Step on Your Path to Enlightenment


"Blessed Fall Equinox. 
May you journey to the depths of your own shadows 
and discover a beautiful darkness, 
the likes of which you have never known." ~laurie frazier

If you are a spiritual seeker—a new initiate perhaps, and heading out on that psychonautic journey of self-discovery, just like we prepare for winter in the fall or before going on a long hike, there are preparations that deserve to be made for spiritual advancement on the path. And if that journey corresponded with the seasons, which I believe it does, that journey would begin with the Autumn Equinox. I could quote things like Joseph Campbell who said, “The goal of life is to make your heartbeat match the beat of the universe, to match your nature with nature” or the Hermetic Law, as above, so below; as within, so without, to better convince you, but that’s better left for my book BEAUTIFUL DARKNESS. For the sake of brevity, Fall has a few main themes: the harvest, darkness and purification. Which all distill down to one thing: clearing our space.
Applying these themes to our lives would look something like this: 
Harvest: In order to clear our space, we get to take an honest accounting of it. It’s a time of recapitulation. What do I have to show for myself? Who have I been being? What actions, thoughts, beliefs, and awarenesses have I been swimming in? What’s been fruitful and what has not? Where am I making progress and where have I come up short? Where has my harvest become unacceptable and no longer a reflection of my current consciousness? 
Darkness: Just as the Fall Equinox in the northern hemisphere, begins the descent towards the shortest day and the longest night at the winter solstice, before we can ascend into the Light of consciousness, we must first descend into the depths of our own sub-consciousness/darkness. It’s time to shine the light on all of our dark places, to acknowledge, be accountable for and either integrate, transmute or purge what we find there. All in preparation of clearing our space. 
Purification: One need look no further than the falling leaves to asses that letting go, is a major theme of fall—and why is it even called ‘fall’ in the first place, huh? Once you take that accounting and see your own darkness, now the question begs, what are you ready to let go of? Of all that shit— toxic emotions, unhealthy relationships and habits, addictions, limiting beliefs, your past, what is no longer serving you? What can you see that would be a hinderance to your spiritual evolution? Yuh…that. An integral piece of this purification process is forgiveness. You can’t really move forward without it. Forgiveness of yourSelf for all the shitty things you’ve done, not only to others but yourSelf. And forgiveness of everything you deem unforgivable that you mistakenly perceive has happened to you and not for you. 
A tall order…not gonna lie. However, essential to your progression, growth and evolution. No magic wand of love and light, holding rose quartz, or smudging yourself with sage will ever take the place of your own accountability and actually doing this work for yourSelf. It’s like that. You are in the process of giving birth to the glorious Soul you came here to be. Like I said to my purging friend in the middle of a plant ceremony, “Giving birth is never pretty…but it is always worth it.” There are beautiful gems of wisdom and self-awareness to be mined in the darkness of your own be-ing. Don’t miss the show. 

If you’d like to take a deeper dive into this, I’ll be doing an on-line work-shop on FB on this very topic. DM me for details at https://www.facebook.com/laurfrazier .  I have other resources available as well as one-on-one coaching. My book BEAUTIFUL DARKNESS A Journey through the Shadows to Emotional Freedom, will be out in the Fall of 2020.  

Thursday, August 1, 2019

Trust Your Heart—Not Your Stories



Did you know, that your heart is the gateway to your Soul? That your heart contains 40,000 sensory neurites and can think, feel and learn independently of the brain? The heart's electrical field is about 60 times greater in amplitude than the electrical activity generated by the brain. It’s magnetic field, is the strongest rhythmic field produced by the human body. Unlike the brain, the heart has no judgment or ego and is without fear. *Info from Greg Braden

All that seemingly trite bs to follow your heart and follow your bliss…it’s a thing. It’s more than a meme on Insta and it isn’t anything to be taken lightly. If you go through life, never tuning in to what it has to say, you will have missed the entire point of your life. Yuh…it’s like that.

And newsflash….the voice of your heart, is not the voice of your parents, spouse, children, church leaders, life coach, therapist or even Jesus, Buddha or Krishna. It is the voice of your very own Soul, your Higher Self, and it contains all the mysteries and secrets as to why you are even here. It’s no accident that it is the first organ that develops in an embryo and it’s your very own internal guidance system. To ignore it, to put your heart-felt desires aside for what you’ve been programmed to believe you are ‘supposed’ to do or ‘should’ desire is to deny your very being.

To quote Morpheous, “To deny our impulses is to deny everything that makes us human.” If you find yourSelf on a little higher frequency than the average blue-pill-er, I’d say it this way, “ to deny our “heartfelt desires” is to deny everything that makes us human. To be human also includes being spiritual. In fact, we can’t really be spiritual, any more than we can be human, as it is just something that we are. You can’t really tell a squirrel to just be a squirrel for it is inherent in his very being. We need only remember, that the nature of our souls/beings is eternal.

There is an epidemic in our western society and that is we have forgotten who we truly are—that we are powerful beyond measure, that we have a mission and a purpose that only we can fulfill. Life is sooo much more than your 9-5, nightly news and mortgage. We did not come here to be blindly devoted to another’s programming. Upon awakening, you will recognize all of the ways your soul has been imprisoned and therefore, impoverished, and you may have a strong urge to liberate yourselves from the veil of unconsciousness.

I believe we are a species with amnesia, I think we have forgotten our roots and our origins. I think we are quite lost in many ways. And we live in a society that invests huge amounts of money and vast quantities of energy in ensuring that we all stay lost. A society that invests in creating unconsciousness, which invests in keeping people asleep so that we are just passive consumers or products and not really asking any of the questions.
 - Graham Hancock

What are those pesky lil questions, you ask? They’re the ones you avoid because you don’t really want to know because to acknowledge what you discover, may cause you to have to take some action, or make some major changes in your life, and change can be scary. Ya know what’s scarier…staying stagnant, stuck and enslaved. Living a life where the lights are half-on til they go out completely, slowly dying in a prison of your own making because you are unable to speak your truth. Many of you refuse to speak your truth because you tell yourselves that you don’t know. The truth is, you won’t even ask the questions, because, deep down you already do know. You think if you can just avoid crystal clarity, you can continue in your half-awakeness....which is exactly where the term, “ignorance is bliss” came from. 

But is ignorance really bliss? Is pretending really blissful, or does it feel more like survival? It’s much easier to feign happiness without that crystal clarity. Just allow the din of all the other voices to out-weigh your own. This is what it looks like: you have a belief that you should and are supposed to stay married against all odds, though your heart is screaming otherwise. So, to avoid the unmistakable voice of your heart, you turn up the volume of the programming that repeats, “you’re doing the right thing, you’re doing the right thing…” Then your brain chimes in with all the other voices that let you know in no uncertain terms how you believe you will be perceived by all those that matter to you and surprisingly all that don’t if you were to do otherwise. Then you come up with more noble-looking thoughts to disguise the voice of your soul a little more like….”I made a commitment…how will this affect the kids….I’m being selfish…” and on and on it goes till the raging flame in your heart becomes nothing but a flicker that you dismiss as the desires of the flesh. Then you give yourself a pat on the back for ‘choosing the right.” But did you really? 

Here’s what else ‘ignorance is bliss” looks like, you have the hunch that your partner may be having an affair but instead of confronting them, you metaphorically put your head in the sand or stick your fingers in your ear with more noise, “la, la, la, la, la…..” Somehow, you think if it remains unacknowledged, then it doesn’t exist—but the heart always knows. So more noise is required to squelch your intuition and keep yourself safe from the truth. But are you really safe? 

We have been completely socialized into not trusting our own intuition, natural abilities, inner knowing, and intelligence. We prefer our desires carefully tucked away in some nebulous cloud, such that we can’t even access how we feel about things, what we want, what or whom we authentically love, or who we truly are. It’s just easier this way and way less messy. We live our lives in the shadows of others expectations while rejecting the true Light of our own Soul, and heart. This is slavery. To look to another for approval, invalidate your own Self, and put your life in the more capable hands of someone else’s, be it individual, church, government, or society. 

What this truly is, is lazy. You don’t need a rule-book to know it’s not ok to take somebody else’s stuff or their life. As a conscious, eternal being, you do not need another to tell you what is right for your life. There isn’t one rule for everyone that says if you got married you should stay married. It’s different for everyone. Only you know if your marriage can be truly transformed and by that I don’t mean putting a simple band-aid on it with another trip to the therapist or ecclesiastical leader. 

If you brush the faux clouds away and tune in, you will just know. You already do know. You’re just afraid. You are the only one that knows if your relationship is toxic to your soul. Only you know if you are or will ever be lit up by your partner, or if you will always feel like you have to dim your light around them. Only you know if you (or they) are merely tolerating, attempting to thrive on scanty rations, or if that person will ever be able to truly fan your flames or not. Laughing, eh? “Fan your flames?” Your partner has no clue as to how to ‘fan your flame’? Maybe because they don’t know who the fuck you. You’ve been pretending so hard, for so long, to be that which you thought they wanted you to be, that they have no clue who’s under all of those masks. Who’s fault is that? 

Whenever we ‘pretend’ to be that which we think others want from us, it can never last without sucking the life and vitality right out of us. It is not easy to be that which you are not—and it is even more difficult to step into the truth of who you really are…at least initially. I promise you though, once you do, it will become even harder for you to pretend ever again because you will feel so happy and free-living the life of your choosing, it will take an army to get you to go back to your old fake ways. 

So…put your hand on your heart, take several breaths, tune in to your heart space and ask yourself some questions. Am I in love with this person? Am I able to be my authentic Self with this person without dimming my Light? Are my dreams supported in this space? Can I be truthful with this person without fear? Would this person love me if they knew who I really am? Looking into the future, is this the person you want to wake up to in five years or even next week? What do you think this person loves about you? Is that the truth of you or a facade? Do you feel like you are a better you with this person by your side, or more like a fraction of yourself? Are their parts of you, you feel are rejected or would be if you released them? 

And to be accountable, where is it that you have created the disconnect between the two of you? Is there any resentment that you could let go of? If you were to forgive them for any perceived wrongdoing, would the spark come back? Where have you closed off your heart and why? Do you think it would make a difference if you opened it again? Is there someone else you’d rather be with? Can you love your current partner as much as you do somebody else? Could you let that third person go completely to dive whole-heartedly back into your marriage without feeling like you just lost a piece of your soul? When you think of the next few years with your current partner, does it feel heavy or light? 

Time to get real? Would your heart be better served by moving on, or by staying together? If you let go of all of your should’s and ought to’s, how (you believe) your children may be affected, what your church has to say, and all the opinions of others—what would your big, beautiful heart weigh in? In other words, Fuck your rules, what does your heart say? But how do you know it’s your heart? Easy. Your heart doesn’t tell stories, nor does it justify its answer. The heart is clear. Vanilla or chocolate? The answer is immediate, and it needs no justification. I choose chocolate… because….no! I choose chocolate because I fucking choose chocolate! Because it is the truth of my soul. Period the end. Nobody is wrong here. The heart chooses what the heart chooses. To ignore it is to fight an unending battle for the rest of your life by going against it. Notice all the stories you will have to create when you do go against it. Just notice. I’m staying because…the children…I made a commitment,…the lifestyle…FFS!! 

The heart wants what the heart wants and it isn’t bad and it isn’t wrong. Your heart is the gateway to your Soul. It always knows the way.  Within your heart and its unequivocal clarity, lies your courage. When you find that, there will be no stopping you. 

 "Never regret anything you have done with a sincere affection; nothing is lost 
that is born of the heart." ~Basil Rathbone


Remember who you are—that you are eternal, but that this earth life is temporary. Trust your heart—not your stories, or the programmed voices in your head. Choose which one you will allow to be your master—your divinity and higher Self or the voice of the masses. Figure out the difference. Your life is waiting. ©lauriefrazier Excerpt from the upcoming book, Get A Fucking Divorce, Already!

Saturday, December 22, 2018

The Longest Night—Winter Solstice Significance

DARK NIGHT OF THE SOUL

“Darkness has its teachings….”  is a line from Trevor Hall song. Darkness contains some of our most profound lessons. 

Light is not born from light—but out of darkness. When we are born, we come out of a dark womb. Jesus was born in a manger, other savior-types were born in caves. We all come from darkness into the Light. 

It is at the coldest, darkest point in the year, that the Light is celebrated on the Winter Solstice. Not because the Sun is at its strongest or brightest then, but because of the promise—the promise of light and warmth to come. The Winter Solstice marks the shortest day and the longest night, in other words, the longest period of darkness in a 24-hr period in the entire year. It’s a passage from darkness into Light; a portal of sorts.  Like after a dark night of the Soul, when you barely reach the other side, with skinned knees, broken heart, and beat-the-fuck-up. But you know, you just know, you will be ok—you will survive this, too. The point when you realize that there is finally light at the end of the long, dark tunnel. It is a glorious moment. 

There is something here that is more palpable, than when you are at the pinnacle of all your glory and have reached the goal and are now basking in the light of your hard-won accomplishments. There is something about this moment, something magical when you pass the darkest threshold. You feel like you can finally stop holding your breath, you are flooded with gratitude like your life will go on—it’s a rising-from-the-ashes-phoenix-kind-of-moment. That’s where the celebration begins. You got to the other side! You braved the solitary journey that only you could make. You emerge from the depths and there is your Divine Team of Light cheering you on. This is the vibe of the Winter Solstice. It’s a victory kind of moment. “You made it!!” You have emerged from the darkness. 

It’s as if in that darkest point, you went through a death of sorts. Whether it was a battle with addiction, the end of a toxic relationship, a personal battle fought within, or a huge loss/setback of sorts. It’s part of a cycle dedicated to death, dying and a stripping away of lingering attachments that are no longer aligned with your Highest Self. It’s a process of whittling down external and material things, that are no longer authentic for you. And often, it’s that which will give you the greatest lessons to lose, whether that is your health, a loved one, a career, a home, wealth, etc.that show-up. I think sometimes the things/people we identify with most, get stripped away to show us that we are not that. We get to realize that we are not those things we so desperately attempt to identify with.  We are not our coveted careers, our prized relationships, our precious possessions, our most brilliant ideas and thoughts, or even our life’s work. Those things do not define us.  
You died to something in this dark space, and you birthed a new Self in the process. And the Universe cheers your hero’s journey. And it is out of this darkness, pain, agony, and heartbreak that the Light is born within. For without darkness, we could not know and appreciate the Light. That’s why this moment is so miraculous. Some don’t make it to the other side. Some die. Some fear death so they don’t even attempt the journey. Many are paralyzed with fear, afraid of the dark, especially their own darkness and what may be lurking in the shadows.  

But not you. You are brave and courageous. You were born to do this!! You chose the evolutionary path. You wanted to learn as much as you could in this lifetime—just in case you don’t get another one! You, brave warriors, ‘chose in’ to every bit of it. You may not remember that, but allow me to remind you-you did. You are having the exact experience that you came to this particular planet to learn. Yay, you!!! Yay for all of your many challenges and perceived struggles. How much have you learned there in the dark? I venture to guess it was a lot more, not to mention more meaningful and significant, then anything you have ever learned in the Light. 

Would you trade it? Would you choose easier? Never. You would not be the you that you are now. We need look no further than to butterflies and chicks. Huh? If you help them get out of their own cocoon or shell, they will not survive. The must do it themSelves. If makes them strong and ready for their next incarnation/re-birth. Evidently, it’s part of our human journey, as well. “Into every life, a lil rain must fall.” It shows us who we are, what we are made of, and how we’d like to show up differently next time. 

When you shift your perception from life is happening to you to that of life is happening for you and that you are actually a request for all that shows up, then you have real power. Contrastingly, when you believe that life is happening to you, that there is nothing you can do about it, and that you are at effect,  it’s as if you envision yourself a tiny sailboat being tossed to and fro on the big-bad ocean. All these waves (problems, people,& challenges) are coming at you and you can’t even take the helm. You are a helpless (and often a hopeless) victim. Life is happening to you and you are at its mercy. 

When you understand that you are accountable for everything that comes into your space, then you have a beginning point. A launch pad for your life! What if there really were no one to blame for anything? What if you knew that your soul was actually a request for every challenge that has come into your life? It’s the good news and the bad news. Bad news like fuuuuuuuuh!!! I created all this?!? Yes, you did, on some level.⁠1 

Good news, in that, you are not a victim!! Congratulations!! If you unconsciously created all the chaos and crap in your life, imagine what you could do with some conscious intention directed to your thoughts, actions, and emotions. What would you choose to create if you knew you were the master of your destiny? How will you enlist all the powers and forces available to you to do so? How will you show up as the powerful-creator you have always known/wished yourSelf to be in the world? What would that even look like for you? Who would you be if you took charge and were just accountable for all of it? It’s a place of power and empowerment. 

News flash!!  This is where your life actually gets really fun and you can start playing with some really cool ideas, concepts, energies, quantum physics, astrology, etc. Many of which we will discuss in this book. But for now, start thinking about what you would like your life to look like and what has been in your way? The way I see it, the only thing that is ever in the way of my success, is me. So start thinking about all of the excuses you have for your own mediocrity…those reasons you have told others and even bought into yourself about your parents, your childhood, your ex, job situation, etc. Write them down. How do they make you feel? 

They are not the truth. And none of them are reasons that you can’t create and have your best life. 

So align with the energy of the Winter Solstice to think about what you’d like to birth. It’s a time of germination, of reflection and resolution. It’s a time to dream and to plant seeds. You have come through a lot, you’ve let go of, or been stripped of much. How will you recreate yourSelf and emerge from the cave?  What seeds of authenticity do you want to plant and nurture? How can you become more YOU? As you envision and conjure a more authentic life for yourSelf, what does that look like? What does it feel like? 

In a brilliant poem by David Whyte, he declares, “Sometimes it takes darkness and the sweet confinement of your aloneness to learn anything or anyone that does not bring you alive is too small for you.”

Here’s to letting go of all that is just too small for you, and to dreaming, envisioning and conjuring your biggest, brightest, most authentic Self. It’s a journey you want to take and a path worth following—your journey, your path, your life. 


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